10 Lessons From A Year of Transformation
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Hi, I’m Jason. If you are a midlife man in a leadership role, I’ve created The Prime Movement for you. It’s a community for those of us who believe in the power of progress - in leadership and in life. Dare to know. Dare to grow.
WHAT’S COMING UP:
I thought long and hard before deciding to send a newsletter this week. What ultimately influenced me was that in an ‘always on’ world, this period constitutes a rare opportunity for you to take time out to reflect. And so Dr Brendon and I wanted to share our own thoughts in the hope they stimulate you to make time to think about what you’ve learnt this year and how that will affect the path you choose in 2025.
Just please remember one thing. The real choice isn't between change and stability (that's an illusion that far too many midlife men continue to cling to), but between being the driver of change or merely its passenger. I hope this Joseph Campbell quote inspires you to take those first steps…
5 Lessons From My Year of Transformation — Founder Jason Leavy
1. The dangers of gamifying your career
At the start of this year I found myself in a common midlife trap - disillusionment in role, but feeling ‘trapped’ by an attachment to external markers of success. A global COO role working with some of the best and biggest brands in the world was in theory everything I’d been working towards, so I couldn’t initially understand why I was feeling such a loss of purpose.
However, what emerged was a growing realisation that my disillusionment was the inevitable outcome of ‘gamifying’ my career - at every stage I was viewing it as a mission to ‘complete the level and get the badge’, and seeing those increasingly senior roles and titles as critical to my sense of identity.
THE LESSON: You need to ensure your choices align with your values rather than the optics or expectations of others. The great salary or impressive title can't fill a void that requires internal work. True satisfaction comes from alignment, not accolades.
2. The power of becoming an eternal student
When I finally summoned up the courage to leave my COO role, I made a number of conscious choices, and one of the most powerful was to become a student again, in the truest sense of the word.
Five years ago that would have meant applying to INSEAD or a similar institution to do an MBA, but what I realised this year was that while I would have undoubtedly valued the experience, the primary driver would have been the wrong one - that of getting another ‘badge’ in a bid to prove to myself and others that I belonged at the ‘top table’.
So this year I resolved to instead invest in myself by exploring the areas I was truly passionate about. Thursday evenings stumbling out of Soho House were replaced by attending talks and lectures by world-renowned thought leaders such as Dr Bessel van der Kolk, Mo Gawdat, Ryan Holiday and Oliver Burkeman.
In the same vein, I abandoned the workout sessions I’d based on the false premise that if I wasn’t lying on the floor dying in a pool of sweat, I hadn’t trained ‘properly’. Instead I went back to my martial arts roots and embraced movement and mobility sessions with some of the world’s leading coaches, rediscovering the magic of what the human body is capable of.
What's fascinating is how this shift has enhanced rather than diminished my leadership capabilities and confidence. The humility to step outside my comfort zone and learn from others - whether it's a 25-year-old movement coach or a 80-year-old psychiatrist - has given me experiences and insights I never would have gained in another boardroom.
The lesson: Resist the urge to ‘quiet quit’ in life and be brave enough to actively seek out new experiences. Stretch yourself, challenge yourself and put in the work, as that is when real magic happens.
3. Fear Isn’t What You Think It Is
Fear has been a constant companion this year, but has shown up in different forms, some of them unexpected.
Fear of failure has obviously been one guise, but the crucial thing is that my fear of failure was actually most present when I was still in my old corporate role - it was the thing I focused on to justify my procrastination - it was the dreaded ‘but what if…’ on steroids. We all tell ourselves stories, and with my focus on hypothetical scenarios of failure, to all intents and purposes I was holding myself hostage and opting for the passenger seat in life, allowing others to dictate my path.
But fear of failure also masked a whole other series of fears - fear of judgment, fear of being ‘wrong’, fear of relevance. It took a huge effort to break those self-imposed chains but with reference to my point below about the power of asking for help, if it wasn’t for the support and belief of others, there’s no guarantee I would have managed it.
Have those fears vanished? No, of course I still have those ‘what if…’ moments. But what I can say is that the power and energy that has been unlocked by taking back the driving seat of my own life is a far more powerful driving force.
THE LESSON: Your biggest fear should be of procrastination, not of failure. In midlife our most precious commodity is time and in my case I wasted precious amounts of it. Whatever you want to do, professionally or personally, just start. Start small. Start big. Honestly, it doesn’t matter. Just please start.
4. Failure IS progress
At 53, I've failed more this year than in any previous year of my career. And surprisingly, it's been transformative.
Let me be specific: I’ve spent months iterating on The Prime Movement's positioning, but each "failed" attempt wasn't just frustration and ‘dead ends’ - it was clarity being forged through iteration. It’s still a work in progress, but as I end the year I know it’s a far sharper proposition than it’s ever been and will continue to evolve.
In just the same way my journey to master new physical movements like a handstand (still a work in progress) has taught me more about patience and progression than any "instant success" ever could.
What I've learned is that treating failure as data transforms it from something to fear into something to leverage. Every unsuccessful version of TPM highlighted what resonated and what didn't. Every wobbly handstand attempt revealed where I needed to build strength and where I needed to develop control.
But here's the real revelation: this year I've sought more help than ever before. From world-class neuroscientists to movement coaches, from executive peers to my own mentors. Ryan Holiday captured it perfectly when he said that seeking guidance isn't weakness - it's strategic wisdom.
THE LESSON: In midlife, we often feel pressure to project unwavering success. But true growth - professionally and personally - requires embracing failure. As midlife men we need to seek out opportunities to fail, not hide from them… and to seek help from others as well in the process. Your life will be richer for it.
5. An Integration Revolution Is Coming
So confession, this is part-reflection and part-manifesto. When I started conceptualising The Prime Movement my ‘pillars’ were my international management experience, my executive coaching expertise and my lifelong passion for health and fitness. However, initially I saw these as complementary, but separate.
But the more I learned and the more I experienced, the more I realized something profound: the divide between mental and physical health isn't just an artificial construct - it's actively holding leaders back from reaching their full potential.
Here's a bold statement to end the year: the era of compartmentalized self-improvement is dying. In a world where we can literally see how sleep affects decision-making, where we can measure the impact of movement on mood, where neuroscience shows us exactly how nutrition shapes cognitive function - treating physical and mental performance as separate domains isn't just outdated, it's self-sabotaging. This isn't just another wellness trend; it's a fundamental shift in how we understand human performance. The leaders who grasp this first will have an insurmountable advantage.
This is why Dr. Brendon and I have engineered the TPM Program to be radically different from traditional executive coaching or wellness programs. We're not just combining different approaches - we're creating an entirely new paradigm of leadership development, one that recognizes and leverages the intricate connections between physical vitality and executive performance.
THE LESSON: If you're serious about reaching your prime in 2025, you need to stop treating your physical and mental wellbeing as separate challenges. They're part of the same system - your own unique system. If you're ready to experience what truly integrated leadership development feels like, The Prime Movement Program could be exactly what you need.
5 Lessons From My Year of Transformation — Chief Advisor Brendon Stubbs
1. Consistency is King
In a year of global travel, relocation, and new parenthood, I maintained five weekly exercise sessions. Many were just 15 minutes, some felt pointless, but this consistency became my anchor during chaos. The science is clear: regular, moderate exercise maintains better hormone balance and mental resilience than sporadic intense efforts. Neuroscience shows these consistent habits create stable neural pathways that support both physical and mental wellbeing. What's particularly powerful is how these modest but regular efforts compound over time - your body and mind benefit more from showing up regularly than from occasional heroic efforts. This consistency has helped maintain my mental clarity and sense of control, even during the most challenging periods of change.
THE LESSON: While chasing the extraordinary, don't forget the secret sauce, consistency of the main behaviours. Commit to showing up regularly, even imperfectly.
2. The Essential Nature of True Friendships
After spending my thirties prioritising work relationships, I've rediscovered the irreplaceable value of genuine friendships. Science confirms that authentic social connections reduce stress hormones and boost immune function in ways that professional networking can't match. The quality of these interactions matters more than quantity - superficial networking doesn't provide the same neurobiological benefits as genuine connection with old friends. This year marked a conscious shift to prioritising real time with friends - not just cursory catch-ups, but genuine, present, laughter-filled encounters. The impact has been remarkable, affecting everything from stress levels to overall life satisfaction. Making time for real friends isn't just enjoyable - it's vital for wellbeing and provides a kind of emotional nourishment that no professional achievement can match.
THE LESSON: Make regular, quality time with real friends as non-negotiable as any other health practice.
3. The Advantage of Seasoned Fatherhood
Becoming a father at 42 has shown me the benefits of life experience in parenting. After enjoying my twenties and building a career in my thirties, I've brought emotional maturity and self-awareness to fatherhood. Research supports that older parents often demonstrate better stress management and decision-making skills. The developmental psychology is compelling: our capacity for emotional regulation and judgment continues developing well into our thirties. Those years of professional challenges, personal growth, and life experiences have contributed to a more rounded worldview that I can now share with my daughter. This timing has allowed me to build a solid foundation - financially, emotionally, and psychologically - creating an environment where I can truly be present and engaged as a father. The 'inner work' I've done hasn't just been personal growth; it's been unconscious preparation for parenthood.
THE LESSON: There's no universal 'right time' for parenthood - the best time is when you've developed the emotional maturity to offer your best self.
4. Choose Energy-Giving Relationships
Life's too short for toxic relationships, whether personal or professional. Research shows that draining relationships actually suppress immune function and increase stress hormones, while positive connections boost overall wellbeing. What's particularly fascinating is how our nervous system responds differently to various types of social interactions - positive, energising relationships trigger oxytocin release and lower cortisol levels, while draining relationships activate our stress response systems, even when we're not consciously aware of it. The shift towards prioritising nurturing relationships has been transformative, affecting everything from mental clarity to physical health. This isn't about casual dismissal of long-term relationships, but rather about recognising that loyalty shouldn't come at the cost of wellbeing. The impact of surrounding myself with positive, motivated people has created an environment where growth feels natural rather than forced.
THE LESSON: Life is too precious to spend with people who drain your energy, regardless of history or obligation.
5. Leaders Must Guard Our Own Wellbeing
Despite leading wellbeing initiatives, I neglected my own health until a breakdown forced change. Now, prioritising exercise, nutrition, and sleep (despite new parent challenges) isn't just personal care - it's fundamental leadership practice. Research shows leaders who maintain their wellbeing make better decisions and create healthier team cultures. The transformation since prioritising my own wellbeing has been profound. Morning workouts, mindful nutrition, and protecting sleep quality aren't just personal health choices - they're essential leadership practices. Studies show that leaders who openly acknowledge their wellbeing journey, including the struggles, create more psychologically safe environments for their teams. This isn't about perfection - it's about authenticity and consistency. The cognitive demands of leadership require a well-maintained nervous system, something I learned through personal experience rather than professional expertise. When leaders genuinely practice self-care, it normalises these behaviours throughout their organisations.
THE LESSON: Your own wellbeing isn't selfish - it's the foundation of effective leadership.
Help Shape The Future Of The Prime Movement: Your Voice Matters
In keeping with my belief in the importance of embracing change and striving for positive progress, I want to ensure The Prime Movement evolves in 2025 to meet your needs in the most powerful way possible. The insights you've just read represent our learning journey, but this movement isn't about us - it's about you. Your challenges, aspirations and needs will shape how we develop TPM to better support your journey. So please take 2 minutes to help guide our evolution:
